Monday, January 19, 2004
The Beginnings
Well we are officially in the process of adopting a daughter (or two) in China. We received preliminary approval today. This Friday, the 23rd of January, we will be having our home study interview with our social worker. Hopefully I will be able to schedule out more of a timeline after that appointment.
How do I describe our arrival at this decision? Ask my longsuffering friends and they will probably say, "why did it take so long?" Since long before Steve and I married, I have had a burning desire to parent. I think it was actually since I was 13 and my baby sister, Michelle, was born. From that point, I wanted to be a mother more than anything.
This particular journey began in earnest, when I had a choice to make: "get over" the disappointment of another broken dream following the second failed domestic adoption and two miscarriages... or take a flying leap into the unknown by beginning the application to adopt internationally. I've always thought there was plenty of time for that decision and then woke up in November to realize that it was now or never. And Steve loves parenting, so that was never an issue. It was just that nothing had worked until now.
I do think in retrospect, I have lived my life in reverse of many women's journeys. Even though I wanted to bury myself in family early on, I floundered in a career... eventually settling on education in my early thirties. I had wonderful opportunities to travel extensively with consulting, to write, to work on degrees, to teach at a local university, and then to earn my National Boards. I still enjoy my career very much, but now I'm ready to do what most women I know pull off effortlessly in their 20's... to parent a child. And for all of those who think that 46 is too late to begin this process, my mom did this biologically when she was my age...
How do I describe our arrival at this decision? Ask my longsuffering friends and they will probably say, "why did it take so long?" Since long before Steve and I married, I have had a burning desire to parent. I think it was actually since I was 13 and my baby sister, Michelle, was born. From that point, I wanted to be a mother more than anything.
This particular journey began in earnest, when I had a choice to make: "get over" the disappointment of another broken dream following the second failed domestic adoption and two miscarriages... or take a flying leap into the unknown by beginning the application to adopt internationally. I've always thought there was plenty of time for that decision and then woke up in November to realize that it was now or never. And Steve loves parenting, so that was never an issue. It was just that nothing had worked until now.
I do think in retrospect, I have lived my life in reverse of many women's journeys. Even though I wanted to bury myself in family early on, I floundered in a career... eventually settling on education in my early thirties. I had wonderful opportunities to travel extensively with consulting, to write, to work on degrees, to teach at a local university, and then to earn my National Boards. I still enjoy my career very much, but now I'm ready to do what most women I know pull off effortlessly in their 20's... to parent a child. And for all of those who think that 46 is too late to begin this process, my mom did this biologically when she was my age...
# posted by lorrainegriffith @ Monday, January 19, 2004 
